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Thursday, January 15, 2015

10 years...

I have never been able to commit to something regularly for more than three years consecutively- so when i think about 10 years of marriage as of tomorrow, i am in awe.  I usually am the type of person that may want to quit when the going gets tough, when things seem so bleak that you don't know which where you are headed, when you keep repeating the same thing over and over again and don't ever seem to be making progress - so when i think about marriage and being with my husband for ten years, i say thank you to god for giving me the hope to keep going, but also thank you to my husband for not giving up.  It takes two of us to make this work - and as much as i would like to give myself credit for it all- he has an equal effort in this.  We make us work - in our own mad, crazy, unique way, we work well together.  What is it that made me not want to give up -because i believed that this is a journey, and that we are both learning from each other on this journey.   I gave it my all because i focused on the good rather than the negative.   I realized that the negative came to us in the form of blessings- to teach both of us to move on higher level, to see past pettiness and always look at the higher good.  That the negatives were and are part of our growth process and that these are lessons we each need to work on.  That sometimes the drama in our lives exist because we need to resolve them and move past them so we can live in harmony.  I also believe that our souls joined together for a reason - as opposites as we are, in being with him for the last ten years, i have come to see how similar we really are on a soul level.  And perhapts that's what keeps us going - because we have created a soul partnership.   So rather than finding fault with each other or blame each Other, we begin to take an internal look at our respective selves and work on the issues that trigger us so we can live in harmony together.  It is the willingness to be completely vulnerable and honest with ourselves first- once we begin to do that, our commitment to each other to make things work becomes stronger. So again the only word i can say is thank you, thank you, and more thank you - because if it wasn't for him, we wouldn't be us, and if it wasn't for me, we wouldn't be us.  We have both committed to creating "us" and it is a beautiful thing.   It is hard work, it is effort, it 100% commitment, it is understanding, it is commuincation, it is alot of humor, it is a big task of non assumptions, and last but not least it is love.

Journal Prompt:  What makes me committed to ________________

Happy Journaling!